Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19) | Sometimes we forget how to be people. But, don’t worry – it’s all coming back to you now.
Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20) | If you’re not having fun, you’re doing it wrong. Unless you’re idea of fun is stealing candy from babies, then that’s wrong, too.
Gemini (May 21 – Jun 20) | You’re suddenly very attractive and interesting this week. Maybe it’s because you switched from pleated slacks to jeans.
Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 22) | Exposing your sensitive side can be scary, but so is being alone forever.
Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22) | Don’t be so uptight so people will start to think you’re a real person – if you’re into that sort of thing.
Virgo (Aug 23 – Sep 22) | Facts and logic have nothing to do with love. Just like facts and logic have nothing to do with why you want to wear leather pants in the dead of summer.
Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22) | Those screaming voices in your head are probably all your suppressed feelings trying to tell you something. It’s about time you paid attention.
Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21) | Go to a coffee shop or a record store or a book store – this weekend’s looking good for the starts of a romantic comedy.
Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21) | It’s easy for you to make friends, but not so easy to keep them. It’s probably because you’re easy, you know, sexually.
Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19) | Crushes on colleagues provide for hours of entertainment when you’re supposed to be working. How far you go is up to you and HR.
Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18) | Sometimes it’s not your fault that you can’t always go play, but when you can – it’s like getting free ham for life.
Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20) | Confide in someone special this weekend and have secret conversations about your bowel movements or your fear of bald cats.